191916

Joke of the Day

"What did the douchebag say to the chemist when he dropped his beaker? U mad scientist?"

"Did you hear about the suicide bomber that became a Youtube sensation? He never thought he'd blow up like this."

"How do you stop an elephant from charging? Vivisection."

"I've started a charity for donating horchata-flavored espressos to deaf Americans in Thailand. It's called the ""ASL Rice Phuket Allonge"""

"let me be very clear: i would rather attend a Pig's wedding than attempt to sift through the dumpster you people have made out of my dm box,"

"Hindsight is $20.20. Don't even ask me what she charged to see her boobs."

"What do you call a jungle where animals talk about current events? A topical rainforest."

"Q: WHY CAN`T BLONDES WATER-SKI? A: When they get their crotch wet they think they have to lay down."

"How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two! One to screw it in and one to suck my dick. *Drew Carey"

"Im really good at coming up with jokes about planes. They always seem to take off."