19081

Joke of the Day

"M: Come to bed... Her: I have a headache M: You're a robot! H: M: H: ...SELF DESTRUCT [BOOM] M: Nice try but you're still under warranty!"

"What's the difference between a stoat and a weasel? One is weasily recognised and the other is stoatally different"

"Q: Where do you look for blonde's obituaries? A: Under ""Home Improvements."""

"What is the Sun's favorite type of music? Sol."

"Who can shave 25 times a day and still have a beard? A barber."

"My pics are real. I don't use any filters. I don't even use coffee filters. I eat coffee straight outta the container like a man"

"How many Donald Trumps does it take to screw a light bulb I don't know but to screw a country it only takes one"

"I've adjusted my insults to be more pc Instead of calling people gay, I call them straight."

"Rumour has it Eminem has converted to Islam. From now on, he will call himself ""Muslim Shady."""

"Me: I want to kiss you everywhere! Her: You mean New York, Paris & London? Me: Um, ya that's what I meant."