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Joke of the Day

"This man says to his friend"" I stopped driving 10 years ago. Now my wife drives and I just sit there and hold the wheel."""

"Sad to hear of the passing of Liesl von Trapp at the age of 73, going on 74."

"What did the timid porn star say to the talking cat? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO LOOOOOOONG JOHNSON!!!!"

"I always do my best work stoned. You can ask any of my ex-bosses."

"I was people would stop asking where I see myself in 5 years... I don't have 2020 vision"

"Did you hear about that guy who was asked to be a Jehovah's witness? - He refused becuase he hadn't seen the accident."

"Why Can't the Guy Addicted to Brake Fluid Quit? He couldn't stop."

"What do you call a family that runs a gas station? Pump kin."

"Your Mother is so fat That even neutrinos can't pass through her"

"Russian kids were writing an essay about their heroes.... ..... The title was: ""Who is your hero and why Stalin?"""