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Joke of the Day

"Donald Trump wants to ban shredded cheese in the United States. He wants to make America grate again."

"Have you heard the one about the late pizza guy? Just gotta work on the delivery."

"Here's a nerdy joke: If you use 8 bits from a Macbook, are you taking a bite from an Apple? Crunch."

"*4yo son, crying* I'm sorry! How was I supposed to know I wasn't supposed to cook the macaroni necklace? *sigh* Parenting is hard."

"Say what you want about pedophiles At least they drive slowly near schools"

"How do you drown a blonde? Stick a scratch and sniff to the bottom of a pool."

"LPT: Laminate your index cards when studying. Not only does it prevent smearing, but the teardrops actually roll right off."

"How do you make a Swiss Roll? Push him down a hill. BONUS: How do you make French Wine? Invade."

"I had a parrot. The parrot talked, but it did not say ""I'm hungry,"" so it died."

"My girlfriend said she wanted to experiment a bit in the bedroom we synthesised a new protein chain"