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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend said she wanted to experiment a bit in the bedroom we synthesised a new protein chain"

"I don't pluck my unibrow to look good, I do it because McDonald's sued me for illegal use of the double arches."

"Keep ""Christ in ""Christopher Lloyd"" because without it, he'd be ""Opher Lloyd"" and that sounds like ""overlord."" Huh? I'll have a Sprite."

"Did you hear about what the medics found on Paul Walker's radio? His face."

"Why did the blonde pull the dildo out before she came? She wasn't on the pill"

"A boy goes into a butcher's shop and says, Mum says can we please have a sheep's head..."". ""...and you're to leave the eyes in 'cos it's got to see us through the week."" Credit to Terry Pratchett."

"Chuck Norris crossed the road. No one has ever dared question his motives."

"*bullies advance* STOP! Im a black belt in Shaq Fu! <laughter> *detectives arrive* Jesus, were these heads slam-dunked? Where r the bodies?"

"What do you get when you cross a hit of acid with a birth control pill? A trip without the kids."

"So I bought the new cod game. Best fishing simulator ever."