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Joke of the Day

"What type of knot do you tie in space? An astronaut."

"I can count the number of times I've been to Chernobyl with one hand. It's 42."

"One-One was a race horse, Two-Two was one too One-One won one race and Two-Two's leg was broken and he had to get euthanized."

"Damn bro, judging by your handshake I would hate to be your d*ck."

"Why don't gay jokes ever get old? Because they get AIDS and die."

"Who is Chu? And why do no rappers fuck with him?"

"If the opposite of pro is con... Wouldn't the opposite of progress be the congress?"

"So, I measured my penis with one of those digital rulers... ...Anyone know how to convert LOL into inches?"

"Adam gave Sally 3 flowers and 1 stuffed animal. Kristen gave Sally 5 flowers and 2 stuffed animals. What does Sally have? cancer."

"On Mondays, Zombies feel alive inside."