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Joke of the Day

"Read aloud and quickly: ""One smart feller, he felt smart"" Freudian slip?"

"I'm taking a 10-hour drive tomorrow and I'm worried about where I'll be pooping. What? No. I don't want to supersize. Aren't you listening?"

"How can you tell someone's a navy seal? they'll tell you in their novel."

"Pravanth the Indian wife-beater punches his wife every night at 7 PM On the dot."

"I have eaten so much of the white bean and kale soup we made this weekend that the EPA just imposed sanctions on my butt"

"Why did god give women yeast infections? So they know what it is like to live with an irritating cunt. Zing!"

"If they added a penis mod to Minecraft... Wouldn't it be called a cock-block?"

"Why was the mother cow mad at father cow? Because she had beef with him."

"Britain can now say.... ...Its pull out game is strong!"

"People think I'm weird because I swallowed an abacus They're forgetting it's what's on the inside that counts."