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Joke of the Day

"Ben Franklin ties a key to a kite, and he's a hero. I duct tape a kitten to a stop sign, and I'm an asshole? Really, History?"

"How did OJ respond when his son asked to borrow the car? >Only if you go aks your mother."

"If laughter was the best medicine... Your face would cure the world!"

"Why did the mathematician move to Seattle? He liked LaGrange bands"

"What do elephants use for tampons? Sheep."

"You are depriving some poor village of its idiot."

"The amount of power surging through me after successfully giving a stranger directions can only be described as dangerous"

"What do call a white guy in a burning building? Fire cracker"

"What's the difference between a duck and a curling iron? A duck is a carbon-based life form while a curling iron is an inanimate appliance"

"How many honest politicians does it take to change a lightbulb? All three of them."