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Joke of the Day

"Ehhhhh! I lost all my money in a Fonzie scheme."

"Having a crush on someone is like solving a math problem. If you know you can't get it, all you can do is just stare at it."

"A drug dealer sold me shoes today I don't know what he laced them with because I've been tripping all day."

"It's a shame Jerry Hall never got it on with Vidal Sassoon Then she'd have completed rock, paper and scissors."

"People don't hate you because you're beautiful. people hate you because you're a nasty b itch."

"My dog is disabled so I have to hold him up when he pees. Long story short, I'm getting really good at writing my name in the snow."

"I noticed that you're still staring at me after I already answered your question, what can we do to stop this"

"Whenever I have a panic attack, I put a brown paper bag over my mouth...and drink all the vodka inside. It seems to help"

"I heard it was medically impossible for a quack doctor to make me straight But my chiropractor managed to realign my spine. He was kinda cute too."

"This joke is so not funny... it makes Robin Williams want to kill himself. too soon?"