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Joke of the Day
"This joke is so not funny... it makes Robin Williams want to kill himself. too soon?"
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"""Inside of a ring or out, ain't nothing wrong with going down. It's staying down that's wrong."" Muhammad Ali"
"Why do they call the hardest group, ""The Group of Death""? Four rosters of boners & you'd want to die too."
"Procrastinators Unite! Tomorrow"
"What's the most depressed thing in the bathroom? The toilet. It always takes all the shit."
"I usually don't pay for sex... ...but sometimes I like to splurge."
"Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they"
"[A montage of me flailing because I walked into a spiders web, with larger and larger crowds, until I am at the karate championships]"
"I accidentally dumped white flour on my black labrador... ...now she's a greyhound."
"(Commercial for noses) *puts bump of cocaine up butt, turns to camera* ""If only there was a better way"""