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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a gay doctor who went to college in France, married an Irishwoman and practiced medicine in Italy? A Fag"

"What gets harder the longer it stays in your mouth? Bubblegum"

"Why can't Jesus eat M&Ms? Because he isn't real."

"My niece just asked for ""cow juice."" So adorable!!! I gave her a styrofoam tray of hamburger blood."

"What's the difference between a gay guy and Hitler? About 45 degrees"

"[Desert island] Me: JANE! Jane: What? M: It's a boat! J: HEEEEEEEEELP! Me writing: Day 286, Jane is still scared of boats"

"Please do not throw cigarette butts into the urinals, as it makes them soggy and very hard to light -Bathroom graffiti"

"I love doggie style as much as the next guy, but sometimes she's just too pretty to fcuk from behind."

"Him: You're not the sharpest tool in the shed, are you darlin? Me: HOW DARE Y... Wait, did you just call me darlin"

"Nice Confederate flag bro, way to commemorate coming in second place in a civil war."