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Joke of the Day

"If I had a dollar If i had a dollar for every time a homeless guy asked me for money, I still wouldn't give him any."

"So Scooby Doo mixes Ruthenium Hydrogen together with alcohol.. RuH-ROH."

"I moved to the south, people are different here. I started a conversation with a midget, but had to walk away. He was a little racist."

"What do the wage gap and the story of Hercules have in common? They're both myths. EDIT: spelling"

"What is it called when you dream in color? A chromatose"

"Friendly like talking"

"Why did the blind man become Hitler? Because he could **Nazi.** *(disclaimer may have to read aloud for joke to occur, if laughing occurs for more than 4 seconds please contact your doctor)*"

"I used to be able to stay out much later than this. I find I just can't any more. My phone battery just doesn't have the stamina any more."

"What do you call a Salmon that sets a good example? A roe model."

"I heard they found the plane.. Well at least Sarah Palin tweeted that she could see the wreckage from her house."