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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot you racist bastard."

"What did the leper say the the prostitute? Keep the tip"

"If I ever only have 3 months to live, I want my ex to move back in. That would be the longest 3 months of my life."

"What do you call a dog with no legs? Why call him? He ain't coming!"

"After we got the divorce she let me have everything. Except the jewelry, and of course something to keep it in. I call it ""the house"".."

"What do you call a woodpecker with no beak ? A headbanger !"

"Haters gonna hate. Potatoes gonna potate. Waiters gonna wait. Aligators gonna aligate."

"How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but I don't know how they'd get in there."

"Why didn't the feminist shave her arm pits? Just kidding, just wanted to rile a few people up. But if you want to have a punchline contest, feel free."

"What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? Bob"