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Joke of the Day

"My new girlfriend wants to meet my dad But I do too."

"How does a Mexican wrestler enter a room? Through the Lucha-door."

"I asked the lady from the collection agency out on a date. She turned me down, but keeps calling. I told her I'm too old for games."

"America will suffer if Trump becomes president... You could say we're going toupee for it"

"What do you call a chicken that can play tennis? A Henman."

"I have decided that I am not a 30 something. I am 29.95, plus shipping and handling."

"In my defense, your baby was crying before I dropped it."

"Why the hell would I use turn signals? I know where we're going."

"I can't decide if I want to watch the original Star Trek of The Next Generation... I guess you could say I'm stuck between a Spock and a Picard place!"

"I could host an elegant dinner party, but I don't know enough people with simmering tension over long-held secrets to make it worthwhile."