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Joke of the Day

"- ""Did you know you can make a pizza crust out of cauliflower?"" - ""I'm going to reactivate my Facebook so I can unfriend you there too"""

"I noticed that the local convent has no security around the building, so I helped myself. No fence. Nun taken."

"Obama: Please don't talk to me until I've had my morning cup of Joe. Joe: no please no more. Obama: shut up Joe. *takes a sip of Joe*"

"What country does every one called Andy come from? Peru, because it's the home of the Andes!"

"What do you call a long bike ride with a bunch of cheap wine? Le Tour de Franzia"

"I knew this girl, she's really deep; she'd always find a reason to preach about how size does matter..."

"My new party trick.. I swallow two pieces of string and an hour later they come out of my ass tied together. I sh!t you knot."

"What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can roast beef but you can't pea soup!"

"Girls, If your boyfriend has to ask you for a blowjob... You've failed."

"Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom's wise words: ""Don't pick that up, you don't know where it's been!"""