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Joke of the Day

"""Gary give me the gun"" ""I thought you had it"" ""I TOLD you to bring it"" ""I didn't"" ""who brought the getaway car?"" -Disorganized crime"

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"I was very tired and needed recovery The cat looks so tired and need recovering his body with watch Television"
"Two olives are pals, and they're hanging from the tree like they'vebeen for months. Suddenly, one falls to the ground. The remainingone says, ""Are you ok?"" And the other replies, ""Olive!"""
"What do you call a Knight that cuts beef? Sir Loin."
"Why did the chicken cross the road? The first side smelled bad."
"The barman says: ""We don't serve faster-than-light particles here."" A tachyon enters a bar."
"The average Canadian couple says ""sorry"" 112 times in their wedding vows"
"How can you lose around 10 pounds of ugly fat? Cut off your head."
"Always end a conversation with ""gotta run"" so people think you're into fitness"
"i'm so bad at rock-paper-scissors, last time i accidently joined a street gang."