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Joke of the Day

"How many ""friend zoned"" guys does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They just compliment it and get mad when it won't screw."

"If you ever get hit by a car, try to spin like a ballerina. You won't get another chance like this."

"For sale: one parachute. Only used once, never opened, slight stain."

"""I saw a flock of cows today"" ""Flock of cows?"" ""Yes a flock of cows"" ""Herd of cows?"" ""Of course I've heard of cows, I saw a flock of them!"""

"Once you've seen an Elephant attacked by a lion... You've seen a maul."

"Teach us About Absolute Zero! 0K!"

"A Star Wars Joke(No Spoilers) Why was Han yelling at Chewbacca on their first day on the Millenium Falcon? . . . Because Chewie was making too many wookie mistakes!"

"How many friend zoned guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they will all just stand there complimenting it and get pissed when it wont screw."

"I'm not into bestiality but... I do like hot dogs"

"Why did the forgetful Mexican cross the road? To get to the other side... err, no it was to pick up the laundry... nope, to get groceries? I forget."