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Joke of the Day

"Even in the darkest moments there's always a light at the end of the tunnel, but yours will probably be an oncoming freight train."

"If you're moving to a new house for a ""fresh start,"" congratulations your new house is haunted."

"Mom, don't freak out, but I'm in the hospital. NoUrImmature, you've been a doctor for eight years now. Please stop starting every phone conversation we have with that."

"I'm such a perv that... ... even the crack of dawn isn't safe."

"Men are the best cooks... One sausage, two eggs, bit of milk and they can fill a woman's stomach for 9 months"

"There is always that one person you want to punch for no reason every-time you see them."

"What's black and eats pussy? Cervical cancer."

"*buys a bunch of stuff at Costco* Sir, you wanna box for those? ""Nah, I hate violence. Can I just pay cash?"""

"A woman walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a double entendre... So he gave it to her."

"Q: What has more lives than a cat? A: A frog -- it croaks every night."