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Joke of the Day
"If I text ""HAITI"" to American Idol, will they send the contestants there?"
Next Joke
"My plane has an entire high school wrestling team on it, so I imagine we'll crash in a forest & I'll become their King."
"Never ever stop pushing yourself. They say 8 hours of sleep is enough. Go beyond it and create history."
"You know what they say about hungry hippos... It was modeled after a date with OP's mom."
"An English Girl.. WIFE: ""I'm going to LONDON. What gift do you want?"" HUSBAND: ""An English girl."" After a month, wife returns.. HUSBAND: ""Where is my gift?"" WIFE: ""Wait for nine months!"""
"Your mama is so ugly that when she met Bill Cosby he made her espresso."
"Wife: Where'd you buy my gift? Me: Bed Bath & Beyond Wife: You used a coupon right? Me: Coupon? *wife faints*"
"How do you know if someone is a vegetarian? Don't worry, they will let you know as soon as they can"
"You know what I hate? 1: Typing 2: Hypocrisy 3: Lists"
"When will forms stop asking me if I'm Mrs, Miss, or Ms and realise I'm an @?"