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Joke of the Day
"Today is a very special day. The one day a year I can say I have a girl."
Next Joke
"went to europe once for a miles davis concert --sorry, i meant kilometers davis..."
"*draws sword* *erases sword because it sucks*"
"You know what they say about cliffhangers..."
"Who the hell invented Bull Riding? ""Hey, I'm gonna hop on that 2,000 pound pissed off animal...Time me!!!"""
"My 4 yr old asked if I was sick, I said ""Yes, please ask mommy to bring me the Sudafed""... My wife walks by me and says, ""Why do you want soup in bed?"""
"What do you call a potato that looks like Hitler? A dick-tator."
"Me: Mistakes my own hair for a spider at least once a day & screams Also me: [watching Criminal Minds] I could totally be a cop"
"What did the druggie do when he got acid? Took some tums"
"Strip clubs should make the strippers wear garlic scented perfumes so when I come home I can tell my gf I was at an Italian restaurant."