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Joke of the Day

"Keep honking. I'm reloading."

"Why is it called the ""color TV""? Because it was invented by a black person!"

"Aieee, Ginsburg's dead! If you've never heard the joke with this punchline, find someone who knows it and ask him to tell it to you. It's very funny, but it's too long to bother typing out here."

"My brother just updated his status to ""I love my girlfriend <3"". I always knew he liked them young, but that is fucking ridiculous."

"What do you call an overweight Mexican? A MAXican"

"What was in those drums of chemicals Captain Malcolm Reynolds hid behind in Firefly? For-Mal-To-Hide."

"[spooky noise comes from my closet] monster under my bed: you heard that too right"

"The circus serves as a great analogy for marriage. You're either walking the tightrope or holding a chair because you told her to calm down."

"I played Two Steps From Hell to my cat, and she became a lion. I played it to my son, he's still a disappointment."

"The only time I seem to be able to count on people is when I nail an abacus to their heads."