18504
Joke of the Day
"Why don't paperclips move around a lot? They like being stationery."
Next Joke
"A student asks another student, ""How many zeroes does your salary have?"" He responds ""One"" ""In which currency?"" ""Any :("""
"Asked for ""change for a dollar"" at the Dollar Store and they just gave me a different dollar."
"There's only one problem where tears are the solution... and that's forgetting to pack your contact lens cleaner."
"You know Stalin tried to invade Scandinavia But he just couldn't finnish"
"Politicians should be limited to two terms... One in office and one in prison. [Credit](http://www.reddit.com/r/news/comments/2jxula/alabama_state_house_speaker_indicted_on/clg2hjl)"
"I'm so old I remember when teens getting pregnant meant ""PANIC!"" not ""Congratulations, you get your own MTV show!"""
"Did you hear about the man who jumped in the Hudson River? He committed sewercide."
"Every time I think I've got the perfect family they escape."
"I had sex last night with a girl who had to be in control of every damn thing. It was my first time having anal sex."