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Joke of the Day

"""i used to live in india, now I live in indiana"" ""is there a difference?"" ""na"""

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"I like my children how I like my essays. Unplanned and poorly executed"
"Fill out job applications in crayon... ...and if you don't get hired, just blame it on your color."
"The War on Terrorism.... ....God's way of teaching Geography to Americans."
"The barman says: ""We don't serve faster-than-light particles here."" A tachyon enters a bar."
"""Cool calculator watch dude."" ~nobody since 1987."
"I'm pretty sure my kids got my good looks... My wife still has hers."
"It's a far cry for Pokemon Omega Ruby to catch up to Alpha Sapphire in sales https://games.yahoo.com/blogs/plugged-in/xbox-one-surges-to-console-victory-in-november-012230994.html"
"I organized a threesome the other day. A couple of people didn't show, but I still had fun."
"As the judge said to the dentist: Do you swear to pull the tooth the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?"