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Joke of the Day

"Why are Rhinoceroses so wrinkly? Because they're hard to iron."

"To avoid identity theft when I die I want to be shredded."

"[starts chanting in unison] In Unison! In Unison! In Unison! Government Official: I don't know what he wants, all I know is I don't like it."

"""I love garlic bread! Put another loaf in the oven baby""fun song I made up at dinner. RT to show my family they're wrong & the song is good"

"Why do Newfies want Quebec to separate? So it's a shorter drive to Toronto!"

"the dead are the best people to not show respect to. suck it, anonymous author of the epic of gilgamesh. I can run& breathe. your just bones"

"My girlfriend started eating my ass during foreplay last night, She asked ""Have you taken a shower today?"" And I said ""What's a shower got to do with my asshole?"""

"[describing sketch artist to criminal] He was pretty good at drawing pictures."

"Three words to hurt a mans ego? ""Is it in?"""

"What's the difference between my bed and my imagination? You aren't naked in my bed."