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Joke of the Day
"Why was the Queen of Horses hated by her subjects? Because she was too ahoof."
Next Joke
"Lost my watch at a party... Saw a guy stepping on it while sexually harassing a girl. I walked up to the dude, punched him straight in the nose. No one does that to a girl. ^not ^^on ^^^my ^^^^watch."
"Life is not a FAIRY TALE. If you lose your shoes at midnight, YOU ARE DRUNK"
"if anyone tels u ""evryday is a gift, thats why its caled the present"" just say ""evryday begins in sadness, thats why its caled the mourning"""
"What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull terrier? Lipstick!"
"What's Santa's favourite metal band? Sleigher."
"Why was The Joker's US Passport application denied? Passports require proof of US citizenship and The Joker is a fictional character."
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot kill, the courage to blow up the things I can, and the wisdom to not get caught."
"Hello 911? Yeah, my wife accidentally fell off a cruise ship 3 months ago"
"I needed a break from stupidity so I left work early."