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Joke of the Day

"Two deer walk out of a gay bar... And one turns to the other and says ""Dude, I can't believe I blew thirty bucks in there"""

"What do you get when you cross a donkey with a jar of peanut butter? A piece of ass that sticks to the roof of your mouth!"

"What do horror movies and printer ink have in common? The black one always dies first."

"Tip: if you don't want comedians weighing in on politics.... ...don't elect a joke. (Credit to Bo Burnham)"

"What did the elephant say to the naked man? Its cute but can you pick up peanuts with it?"

"I once dumped a cross eyed girl. I thought she was seeing someone else%3ss eyed girl. I thought she was seeing someone else"

"[Russian Joke] What will the results of the next election be? No one knows! The results were stolen from the Politburo just last night!"

"Police arrested two kids yesterday. one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one, and let the other one off."

"What do you call the urinal section of the bathroom? The place where all the dicks hang out."

"What's brown and Rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.......just kidding.....poop"