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Joke of the Day
"It's better to have business with a drunk professional than a sober idiot."
Next Joke
"What looks better... than roses your piano? Tulips on your organ."
"Trump isn't wrong when he uses ""alternative facts""... He's just alt-right."
"Brexit EU now has 1 GB of free space!!"
"The hardest part What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? The wheel chair"
"I definitely could NOT be a surgeon. blood freaks me out when I'm high"
"3 women in a bar.. talking about how loose they are. One fits a sausage one fits a cocumber and the other one slides down the bar stool."
"[first date] *pointing indiscriminately* ""uh-oh looks like we're on the Kiss Cam"" there's no- *leans in* there's no Kiss Cam at Applebees"
"I learn something new every day that I didn't want to know."
"My six replaced the toilet paper roll all on her own and now I'm wondering who her real dad is."