183708

Joke of the Day

"Me: So excited for the weekend! Predatory alien in disguise: Same here! Sooo easy to catch, right M: Huh P: The weakened M: What P: What"

"Reddit, what are some of your best Special Olympics jokes? NSFW"

"I gotta stop living every day like it could be my last. The hangovers are killing me..."

"When is my wifes favorite day for sex? Tomorrow"

"I met a girl who said she orgasmed every time she sneezed I asked her what she took for that. She said usually pollen or ragweed"

"People need to stop asking me about my 5 year outlook I don't have 2020 vision"

"YOUR SO BALD THAT WHEN YOU WHERE A TURTLENECK YOU LOOK LIKE A ROLL ON DEODORANT."

"Behind every successful man there's a woman they say, But behind a successful woman there's a stupid man."

"The neighbors are still looking for their dog. That shit was good"

"I saw a Jewish Ghost last night... It was so scary I started to Shiva."