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Joke of the Day

"I didn't want to believe my flatmate was stealing from his job as highway maintenance ...but when I got home all the signs were there."

Next Joke
 
"The banana apologized to the apple. You're very sweet, but I'm sorry I don't find you a**peel**ing [I know this was terrible. I guess this wasn't your taste.](#s)"
"""HULK WANT LOAN."" Bank: ""We can't loan to people like you."" ""GREEN SKIN PEOPLE??"" Bank: ""No, people who owe 2.6M in property damage."""
"Best way to speed date: ""What's your favorite subreddit?"" ""What's a subreddit?"" ""Next."""
"Lately every post on /r/Jokes has become a pun in the English language :( It's not pun anymore."
"Hey gurl, how about you make the Patriots and deflate these balls."
"I'd say giving birth to a dead baby is better than having a miscarriage At least your baby's still born?"
"What do you call a chinese guy with a long penis? Long Wang... or nonexistent whatever you prefer"
"The Edmonton Oilers"
"WORK TIP: Respond to all your boss's emails with ""Heyyyy you!"""