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Joke of the Day

"What happens if socialism comes to the Sahara? Old Soviet-era joke told in Russia: What happens if socialism comes to the Sahara? Nothing at first, but then the sand shortages will start."

"Drug Problems I've definitely got a drug problem......................... Seem to have run out"

"Me: ""I want to go on a diet."" Food: ""LOL no."""

"I may not show up to work on time, but dammit I leave early."

"What do you call the father of a frog that is in the early stages of its life? *A Dadpole*"

"HI, I'M STEVE'S CAPS LOCK KEY, AND I'D LIKE TO MEET OTHER CAPS LOCKS KEYS. I'M INTERESTED IN BOATING AND HIKING."

"What do you call a gay light fixture? A chandiqueer"

"Brazil - Germany, the most embarrassing semi since... ... I watched Brokeback Mountain with my Dad."

"Girl are you the legendary Pokemon Mewtwo? Because I've been playing with my balls all day and you're nowhere to be found."

"10 things you didn't know you could do with a selfie stick. 1. *Use selfie stick to stuff rags in your exhaust pipe* 2.*Use selfie stick to beat ppl who have selfie sticks* 3"