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Joke of the Day
"What do men and women have in common? They both distrust men."
Next Joke
"A beggar walks up to a wealthy, upper-class lady and says, ""I haven't eaten in three days."" She responds, ""You must force yourself! You must force yourself!"""
"Somebody finally complimented me on my parking today! I got a note on my windshield that said ""Parking Fine""."
"Me: Do you have any wrongdog? ""Ugh fine what's wrongdog"" Me: thank you so much for asking I'm doing terrible"
"Perfection ""Practice makes perfect"" ""Nobody's perfect"" I'm so confused"
"Eat right. Stay fit. Die anyway."
"Pilot makes a sudden sharp turn, comes on speaker ""Just kidding!! Attendants will be by with new underwear. Have a nice flight everybody."""
"I must be baked Two muffins were baking in an oven. One muffin looked at the other muffin and said, ""Hey man, is it getting hot in here?"" And the other muffin said, ""Ahhhhh! You can talk!"""
"A male unexploded landmine was in love with a female unexploded landmine and he said to her ... ""Hey baby, we should bang sometime."""
"I just gave a bus full of teenagers the finger before they had a chance to give it to me."