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Joke of the Day
"Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? She worked it out with a pencil."
Next Joke
"Why did the Frenchman not want two eggs? Because one egg is un oeuf."
"special thanks to people on yahoo answers who have asked literally every question ive ever googled"
"What's a Jehovah's Witness's favorite band? The Doors."
"God all I want is a chance to prove that winning the lottery won't change me."
"If your mother-in-law and a lawyer were drowning and you had to choose... would you go to lunch or a movie?"
"People who live in glass houses must have to clean up a lot of dead birds."
"ME: *pointing gun* Give me everything. WORKER: Sir, this is a pet shelter. ME: I know. *carried off into the sunset by a wave of animals*"
"What's Sarah Palin's favorite thing to do in the summertime? Parah Salin."
"What did the constipated mathematician do? He sat down and worked it out with a pencil."