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Joke of the Day

"A Jewish Kid... Asks his dad to borrow $5 his dad replies with ""$4 dollars?! what do you need $3 dollars for?!"""

"Why did Ken and Barbie never have any kids? Ken always came in a different box."

"I am not the kind of girl you can take home to your wife."

"Have you got a copy of ""Living with a small penis ?"" Librarian ""I don't think its in yet"" ""Yep thats the one"" I replied"

"My life is a constant cycle of waiting until the weekend and then not doing anything when it comes."

"So it looks like there was a paedophile ring operating at the heart of Thatcher's government. I don't know why everyones so shocked, they were well known for fucking miners."

"Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes... That way when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes. [Credit Jack Handy, I believe]"

"I was more nervous than a whore in church to tell you this But your about as useless as tits on a nun"

"I just saw someone by themselves not looking at a phone. Hope they're ok."

"Put the punchline in the title. How to ruin a joke"