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Joke of the Day

"ME: Mint choc chip ice cream, pls. I got my own cone [places it on counter] EMPLOYEE: This is a traffic cone? ME: You must be new here."

"Does Alfred masturbate? ... No he masturwaynes"

"LPT...never trust a Genie who.... calls his penis his LAMP. I never got my wishes."

"My colleague can no longer attend next weeks Innuendo Seminar so I have to fill her slot instead."

"Q: On a scale from 1 to 10, what is your favorite color in the english alphabet? A: Yes"

"You was sent back to earth from hell becasuse the devil choked on your soul."

"*watches you carefully arrange the piles of paperwork on your desk *waits for you to finish *sets fan to ""oscillate"""

"What did the Abominable Snowman do after he had had his teeth pulled out? He ate the dentist."

"A Russian man makes a remarkable discovery ""What poor people there are in America,"" a man tells his comrade, ""Their cars don't have hoods, their phones don't have buttons, and their wine is old!"""

"I saw a sign at a drug rehab center It said ""Keep off the grass"""