179794

Joke of the Day

"Where do people with ADHD go? To concentration camps."

"My friend stabbed me with a pencil, I guess you could say I got the point."

"What is black and smells like blue paint? Black paint."

"I once told a joke so corny... That it was sold at the farmers' market"

"A chicken lays a man on the floor Which came first?"

"How do you get a cut-price parrot ? Plant bird seed !"

"So this one time I offered some shrimp to this Jewish friend of mine... Me: This shrimp is great. Wanna try some? Friend: Sorry, I'm Jewish. Me: No, it's free! *from a comic by Cyanide and Happiness*"

"TIL The deadliest Medieval warrior was a Scottish tailor. ....He kilt thousands of people."

"Accidentally pushed the premium gas button and now I'm worried my car is high."

"What did the egg say to the boiling water? ""It might take awhile for me to get hard, I got laid this morning"""