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Joke of the Day

"Oh, you love your boyfriend? Please, go ahead and saturate my Facebook news feed with your feelings."

"I once dated a mortician... it didn't work out because I'm not that much of a mourning person. Though she was a real head-turner."

"If you still talk about it, you still care about it."

"What is the worst joke you have ever Heard? I'll start it off: Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The Ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent."

"Geico could probably save you more than 15 percent if they stopped spending 95 billion dollars on advertising."

"As a gift to my girlfriend, Tola, I tattooed her name on myself in the mirror. I think that says alot."

"Where did Lisa go during the bombardment.. Everywhere"

"Threesome? No Thanks! If I wanted to dissapoint two people at once I would just have dinner with my parents"

"Why is the mens bathroom such an angry place? It's where all the pricks hang out."

"My wife depleted the power on my phone when I needed it the most. Yet I'm the one who is charged of battery..."