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Joke of the Day

"Your beauty cannot be contained by the set of all real numbers. That's because it's imaginary."

"Wait you misunderstood. When I called you ""doll face,"" I was referring to Chucky."

"What did Trump get for Christmas? Stage IV rectal carcinoma with a recto-vesicular fistula so he farts out his penis...hopefully."

"They won't admit the Egypt flight crashed... ...because they're all in *da nile.*"

"If I use the bathroom at someone's house and they are out of hand soap, no more high-fives for that person."

"My mate died from a bad case of heartburn I can't believe Gaviscone."

"I went to the library and asked if they had any books on Schrodinger's cat and Pavlov's dog. The librarian said that they may or may not have it, but that it rings a bell."

"How did Helen Keller burn her ear off She answered the iron"

"Bob Marley in Saudi Arabia I Shot The Sharif"

"What did the gay deer say after he left the bar ? Man, I can't believe I blew 50 bucks in there"