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Joke of the Day

"A good thing about being single is I don't have to worry about anyone flushing while I shower. Or caring that I exist or whatever."

"So my friend said to ex girlfriend ""Please dont throw me under the bus"" I replied "" Ya thats right throw her under the subway"""

"Used way too much moisturizer and I may have to call in slick tomorrow."

"A teenage boy asks his granny: 'Have you seen my pills, they are labelled LSD? Granny: ""Fuck the pills; have you seen the dragons in the kitchen?"""

"saw girl I have crush on with her new fiance at Ikea but you know what they say, when God closes a Stras Innjrden he opens a Fonstrvivig"

"POKER ANIMALS Q: What animal should you never play cards with? A: A cheetah!"

"Why did the investment bankers start dating? Compound interest"

"What do you call a guy in a suit sitting in a tree? Branch Manager"

"Q: What kind of bees produce milk? A: Boobies"

"Why did the bear run around his bed? He wanted to catch up on his sleep."