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Joke of the Day

"The vegetable crisper or as I call it, the cold garbage can."

"Imagine if trees gave off Wi-Fi signals, we would be planting so many trees and we'd probably save the planet too. Too bad they only produce the oxygen we breath."

"Bill Cosby was actually gonna be in a Marvel movie He was gonna play Sandman."

"What's worse than finding hair in your food? Finding out the chef is bald."

"What will the first female Mexican head of state be called? The Precedent."

"What do you call an Asian who's tolerable some of the time? Occasionally (OK Asian Lee)."

"I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She replied, ""Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!"" I said, ""Wow!"" Then her friend said, ""She means 6663629."""

"I just found out my wife has an identical twin I saw her on Tinder."

"Turning vegan is a big missed steak."

"I'm living in a rough neighbourhood... Some thug tore the front and back pages of my dictionary out! It just goes from Bad to Worse"