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Joke of the Day
"What's black and doesn't work? Decaf coffee you racist fuck."
Next Joke
"What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car Robin"
"Name your kid Basil and see what happens. BEST case scenario he spends hours a day updating Wikipedia."
"My friend kees saying ' cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole of water' I know he means well."
"I think Taylor Swift might actually just be an instagram filter"
"Why do melons always have big weddings? Because they can't elope."
"The thing I like best about smartphones is how they're a prison you keep in your pocket"
"What's the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with large breasts? One's a crusty bus station and the other's a busty crustacean!"
"If the Scottish started to colonize North America before the British... Could I say that the Scott Pilgrims landed at Plymouth Rock?"
"A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar... ...and they have a good time because because they're not fucking assholes."