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Joke of the Day

"I told my gay friend I could turn fruits into vegetables... He said ""prove it."" So I pushed him off the balcony."

"What date is it today? 2nd April. Ha!! April fool!"

"Women need to learn how to use Snapchat. It's only for sexting, I don't want to see pictures of your feet or your new perm."

"I like my women like Hawaii... Warm, wet, and Asian."

"My nose was clogged the other day. A dutch woman kicked me right in the face."

"I used to have a 2 year old son, he died the same way Eric Clapton's son died... For inspiration"

"How do you know your roommate is gay? His dick tastes like shit."

"What's the difference between LSD and my dad? LSD doesn't need to be drunk to hit me."

"What do prime numbers and white girls have in common? They literally can't even."

"My wife is angry because I brought home a B.L.T. instead of a roast beef sandwich. Oops, wrong sub."