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Joke of the Day
"Knock Knock Who's there ! Alda ! Alda who ? Alda time you knew who it was !"
Next Joke
"When runner-ups in reality shows say, ""I may not have won but I'm still a winner,"" do they understand how language and/or competition works?"
"M: Are you gonna eat that baby? Lady: What!!?! Go away you Sick-O' M: Sorry! I saw you putting it on Instagram & figured.. Never mind."
"A guy walks into a bar with jumper cables around his neck... Bar tender looks at him and says, ""I guess I'll let you hang out but you better not start anything."""
"Q: How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb? A: Twenty. 1 to hold the bulb 2 to turn the ladder and 17 to be on the guest list."
"There is no more horrible death than the one of a poor tree that ends up being a Twilight book."
"When the pope dines with homeless people hes an amazing person. When I do it I'm just another homeless person."
"Want to hear a joke? . . . The WNBA! Want to hear another? Women's Rights"
"What's the hardest part to cook in a vegetable ? The wheelchair"
"My wife and I switched positions to make our night more exciting last night... so she sat on the couch and I washed dishes."