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Joke of the Day
"There is no more horrible death than the one of a poor tree that ends up being a Twilight book."
Next Joke
"Chemists do tell jokes, but there's no reaction because all their people skills Argon. Omg, that's Sodium funny, right? Na? Okay."
"In the 17th century, villagers would burn down entire neighborhoods to combat diseases such as bubonic plague, typhus, and gluten."
"You know you're hung over when people recognize you but they think you're E.T."
"How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg? ...pick it up and suck it's dick."
"I hate when people ask me what I'll be doing with my life in 5 years... I mean, come on, it's not like I have 2020 vision."
"What's Dr. Dre's favorite vegetable? Beets."
"judas: i would never betray jesus he's the best jesus: my favorite movie is the Minions Movie judas: i am going to betray the son of God"
"Aaron Hernandez He used to be a tight end, but prison will turn him into a wide receiver. ;)"
"Whenever I'm tempted to talk shit to a perfect stranger on Reddit I always remember my mother's wise words: ""Shut your fucking mouth, no one cares what you think."""