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Joke of the Day

"Making the arrangements for my wife's funeral is tough. She keeps asking what I'm doing"

"What is the definition of a 'double standard'? If a girl sleeps with a ton of guys she is a slut, but if a guy does it, he is a homosexual."

"While we frantically work to solve the budget crisis, a much bigger threat looms. Cats are running out of funny photo poses."

"I drive a 5 wheeler... But ones in the trunk"

"At least Stevie wonder was faithful, he never saw any other women during his marriage."

"this toddler on the bus said ""the wheels on the bus go round & round"" & this guy yelled back ""no shit Sherlock"" & I can't stop clapping?"

"""john could tell that emily was getting tired of him narrating their date"""

"What is a feminist's favorite math topic? Triggerednometry"

"Why did the cannibal get banned from the hospital? He kept trying the doctors patients(patience)"

"I asked a terrorist how his day was going... He said it was great, his son died in a car bombing. The only problem? His son borrowed his car."