175937

Joke of the Day

"Life is about perspective. The sinking of the Titanic was a miracle to the lobsters in the ship's kitchen."

"The Romans have a lot of Gods. They have a God for everything. The only thing they don't have a God for is premature ejaculation. But I hear that's coming quickly."

"So a duck walks into a pharmacy... and asks the pharmacist, ""Do you have any chapstick?"" When the pharmacist hands it to him, the duck replies ""Thanks, just put it on my bill!"""

"My wife always accuses me of having a favourite child. It's not true, I love Matthew and Not-Matthew equally."

"What did the wall ask the picture? (All together now!) ***""How's it hangin'?""*** ~Skip"

"Today morning when I was driving my Ferrari, the alarm woke me up. :)"

"I like my women like I like my coffee... Ground up and in a can."

"How do you stop water from running? Don't pay the water bill."

"Do you know the difference between curtain and toilet paper? -Do you know the difference between curtain and toilet paper? -No... -GUYS, HE DID IT!"

"> Unsubscribe from LinkedIn > Delete email account > Sell house, live in woods > Find bottle in river > Has note inside > It's from LinkedIn"