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Joke of the Day

"I found the rulebook for an old card game at my grandfather's house. ""Draw a card, if it's black, take a shot."" Oh wait, that's just the LAPD guidebook."

"Why????? Which service would the with ask if she would check into a hotel??? THE BROOM SERVICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"My husband still talks about that one time he loaded the dishwasher correctly like it's going to get our kids into Harvard."

"I'm sorry, I don't see why you can't have a crack house AND have it tastefully decorated."

"Why shouldn't you take rimjob jokes seriously? Because they're all tongue in cheek."

"Pal - ""Can you help me put this IKEA desk together?"" Me - ""I'll need a screwdriver."" Pal - ""Sure what type?"" Me - ""Greygoose or Kettle One."""

"""Have you heard about the new pirate movie?"" ""It's rated aaarrrrrrrr."""

"Basketball would be a lot more exciting if each team was allowed one bear."

"How do you keep an imbecile happy all his life ? Tell him a joke when he's a baby !"

"What does it take to reunite the Beatles? 2 more bullets"