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Joke of the Day

"I still can't believe it when someone in the bathroom stall next to me is talking on the phone I mean, who TALKS on the phone"

"What is Error 619? When your kid sleeps in between."

"How does a crackhead order their whiskey? On the rocks"

"The fences at the zoo are to keep the animals safe from Chuck Norris."

"I used to not get on with my mother-in-law but over the last few months I've developed quite an attachment for her. It goes over her head and a strap comes down under her chin to keep her mouth shut!"

"Why did the man with one butt cheek get fired? He did everything half-assed."

"i feel like a hundred bucks! *my soul erupts with the strength of 100 wild male deers*"

"a wise man once said to me: ""why are u doing that? why do u exist? why are we talkimg?"" a whats man once said to me: ""what ar"

"What's a prostitute's favorite position? Whore-izontal. Zing! This has been a productive day at work."

"Why do sorority girls travel in odds? Because they can't even!"