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Joke of the Day
"*stands on a curb next to a stranger* What if i was this tall"
Next Joke
"What do you get when Italians join ISIS? Baked Yazidi"
"What's the difference between a cactus and a BMW? With a cactus, the pricks are on the outside."
"Sorry to hear about your breakup. If it's any consolation, I don't know what he ever saw in you."
"Thanks to whoever invented the mute button, because I can poop while on a conference call."
"I run a suicide hotline. A guy called me once, told me I had 60 seconds to convince him not to jump off his balcony on the 41st floor. He must've confused me with the *anti*-suicide hotline."
"Money isn't everything but it sure keeps you in touch with your children."
"""FOR SALE: blender, like new. Does NOT make things taste like crayons ALSO FOR SALE: wax fruit, slightly scratched."""
"Did you hear about Ryan Seacrest's beard? Apparently she's a former Miss Teen USA."
"Did you hear about the blind circumciser? He got the sack."