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Joke of the Day

"Liver Doctor: You are in trouble, your liver is enlarged Patient: Does that mean I have more space for whisky now?"

"i want to take one of those cruises where people shit right there on the boat but apparently they only happen randomly as a surpris,e"

"What's the difference between a tire and 365 used rubbers? One is a Goodyear, and the other is a great year."

"Why is leather armor the best for sneaking? Because it's made of hide"

"What's the difference between a cow and 9/11? Americans can't milk a cow for 12 years I'm sorry"

"doing sports is ninety-eight percemt confidence and two thousand percent talent and three fifths makimg math dudes mad"

"What's the difference between a biscuit and a monster? You can dip a biscuit in your tea but a monster is too big to fit in the cup."

"I was listening to my wife argue with our 5 y/o. I didn't want to tell her he was right so karate chopped the TV to create a diversion."

"BREAKING NEWS: A man who took an Airline company to court after his luggage went missing has lost his case."

"I have a horrible sleeping disorder where I have to wake up every morning and go to work."