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Joke of the Day

"What kind of car did Jesus drive? a manual."

"HEY LOOK AT MY COCK!!! Isn't it a pretty rooster?"

"I'm a ventriloquist. I can put my hand up your skirt and make your lips move!"

"My wife is scrolling through Netflix to see what shows I watched between now and when she asked me to vacuum. Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit."

"My friend just joined ISIS I was always bothered by his Sunni disposition"

"There once was a soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray... He is now a seasoned veteran."

"I heard a bunch of Chinese people chanting ""We want rights! We want rights!"" They must be scared of the dark or something."

"What kind of bug wants to buy lawn turf? A gras shopper."

"i like my beer like i like my women in large cups"

"If you think my status updates are ridiculous, you should see my life choices."